Tuesday, October 20, 2009

between a rock....and another rock. with a third rock zoning in right about....now.

I'm not a spontaneous person. I usually think every little action out. I play everything safe.

For once, I decided not to. As I said before, I applied to grad school, quit my job (thinking I would start for the Fall semester), signed a lease to an apartment, found out I COULDNT start grad school, and then moved anyway.
Between savings and my dad, i've done alright for the past 6 weeks. But no job has turned up. Plenty of interviews....but no job. Lots of "I'm sorry, buts..." but no "Congratulations, we'd like to.."

I don't know why. I graduated Cum Laude. I have a diverse and well-suited background for every job I've applied for. I volunteer, I've held leadership positions, and for the preschool jobs I have a kick-ass portfolio of lesson plans, bulletin boards and projects.

But nothing.
Basically, I jumped with out a net and hoped it would appear.
It hasn't. And my freefall to Earth will soon probably end with a splat.

I absolutely DO NOT want to move back to New Jersey. I love my family - but all of my friends are down in Southern PA. I absolutely despise everyone my age in this area...I love being near my 3/4 of my closest friends. Despite the whole not having a job and living basically on the brink of poverty, I'm 09327502375x happier than I was in NJ.
I moved back for a year after college, and I honestly think I cried every day, I hated my life so much. I was completely miserable. I think you can count the number of times I went out at night for the entire year on one hand.
But my dad can't really help me anymore, since his company is on the brink of going bankrupt and my stepmom got laid off 3 months ago.

So what's a girl to do? Do the logical thing and move back home, or stick it out where I am? One thing's for sure, I have seldom few days to make up my mind.

2 comments:

Tina Fabiano™ said...

Can you start grad school in the spring? If that's the case and if it were me, I might move back home with the family for a little bit. Just to regroup and try to conserve as much money as possible. I'm not sure what the best option is for you, but I always enjoy hiatus' at home.

WORDY GIRL said...

Despite your struggles I enjoyed reading your blog.

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