Friday, November 13, 2009

the best years...take 2.

I decided over a year ago that I wanted to write about my college years. Actually, somewhere in the abyss of my mind, I decided it before I even graduated. On the surface it seems like it should be easy enough. But will I ever be able to give those years the justice they deserve? And if I can, then comes the hard part - narrowing it down to the events that matter most, because in 4 years at my beloved Alma Mater, I had enough (mis)adventures to fill a library.

So what do I write about? Do I write about the 20 or so of us who ran around campus together as Freshman, like we were invincible? The newness of everything still fresh in our minds, just starting out on our adventure. The Codorus Girls and the Evergreen boys - we thought it would go on forever. I could easily capture the newness of it all, the struggle to adjust to life with out parents and siblings, aunts and uncles. How from day 1, we started to feel like a family and high school started to become a distant thing of the past, so easily forgotten .

I could also right about our tumultuous Sophomore year, once the newness had worn off but the end was still no where in sight. The "hump" year. Not Freshman, we knew the routines and the dailiness, but we weren't quite upperclassmen thinking about what would come after. For me, it was the year of J and A, two of my best friends. Two girls who I have the dream friendship with. When Julie and I are together, we speak a language that only Ashley can sometimes understand. It's funny how much of that year they consume, especially when considering that they would have such little impact on my last two years of school, but have, since graduation, come back to once again be 2 of the people I trust most in this world. Two people with whom time never changes our friendship - months can pass with out talking and then a phone call changes everything, and nothing has changed between us. Two people who I can't imagine my life with out.

Or maybe I should start with Junior Year - the year of the Alpha Lambdas. The end was slowly starting to creep into our vision, but it was still so far away that it hardly seemed tangible. The year of Phi Sig - when the 5 of us became who we are today. In some ways, it definitely feels like it's where I started to become the person I am today, I can say with a fair amount of certainty that with out the Alpha Lambdas, I have no idea who I would be today. That year definitely holds a special place in my heart, and I will forever look on with with happiness. It's hard to believe that yesterday marked three years since it began. In some ways, it seems like just yesterday we were pledging, getting in, I can still remember everything about that time, and as much as we complained about all the work at the time, I know that I personally wouldn't change a thing. On the other hand, i can hardly remember a time before I knew them. Before we were the "creepers." the Lambs. The Furious Five. I often wonder too what role Marina would play in it all if she hadn't left school and refused to stay in touch. We wouldn't be the Furious Five, that's for sure. The Sassy Six maybe?

Or maybe, I should write about the end - Senior year. The 4 O's. Really, it's more than senior year, it's the summer after Junior year, the year we lived at the 300 Zoo. When the 4 of us were inseparable, we still had our Lambdas, but the O's were different. We were roommates, they were my best friends. I probably miss the year on 300 more than any of the other years, although I think it's extremely safe to say that with out the first three years happening the way they did, I doubt that the fourth year would have much significance. The year was passed on the porch, cups in hand. It was passed with inside jokes, laughter and knowing that before we could blink, graduation would be here and it would all be over.

I look back on my college years as the best four years of my life, even though it has been a little over a year since it has ended. I haven’t written any thing substantial in a long time, aside from blog entries, and I want to capture these 4 years before I forget them. Because that is my greatest fear - forgetting one second more of this time. I know some moments have already faded from my memory - things that are seemingly insignificant but truly helped to define the person I have grown into.

We entered as children, completely on our own for the first time in our lives. The choices we made during these years led us down paths. Some of these paths we forged together, others we traveled alone. But through it all we were there for each other. We left as “adults” ready to face the world and what ever it would bring. At least, that is what we were told as our identity as college students was stripped away from us - whether we were ready or not.

It felt as though we weren’t ready, but the events that have happened since than have proved that maybe we are ready to take on the roads and lives that lie ahead of us. Like we have a choice in the matter.

That is the story I want to capture - the little moments. Those moments that to an outsider, may seem like a forgettable, completely unremarkable encounter, but to me are the snippets of time I wish to hold onto more than anything. The moments passed on the porch, in the sorority house, where time almost felt like it was standing still to give us another moment to savor, but in reality it was hurling us forward into the unknown.


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